Girl

[prog]

Already rethinking earlier statement about the word "girl". To go against college-indoctrinated language lessons feels like a tiny act of sacrilege, and invites a deal of internal debate. Here is an excerpt:

jmac: After all, there are plenty of contexts where I could legitimately use "boy" in reference to an adult male.

strange interlocutor: Fair enough, but what about that context in the cafe? if you'd been served your coffee by a man, would you have written "the boy who..."? No, you'd have written "the guy who...", and I resist your sexist equivalence of the ambiguous "guy" with the diminutive "girl". Shame shame shame on you.

jmac: [Mumbles, shuffles feet.]

This is an old argument and I back away from having an official opinion on it for today.

Comments

[lyricon.livejournal.com]

Always a strange, awkward discussion. I also have somewhat ambiguous opinions about it. I'm not sure I really mind being referred to as a "girl" but then again, I'm not sure I really like it either. Perhaps it depends almost entirely on the context of the situation for me. Hmm.

However, when I refer to other people I have found a way to avoid the connotations of "girl" or "guy" or whatnot, by adopting the habit of using the vaguely archaic words of "lady" and "gentleman" in most situations. For example, when I am speaking to several male-oriented persons at work, I might address them with, "Good morning, gentlemen. How are you doing today?" Or when describing an female acquaintance say, "Dana is a lady with a wonderful sense of humor blahblahblah..."

Of course, this works for me also because I like to be a little outside of the norm in terms of my speech patterns. Somewhere between old fashioned and sophisticated. I'm not recommending it for everyone, but I personally find it quite enjoyable.

[mrmorse.livejournal.com]

I have encountered people who object to "lady" on the basis that it's sexist. "Lady" carries an implied gender role which makes it inappropriate for referring to women in general.

I'm not sure if I believe that, but I do know that it's made me paranoid.

[keimel.livejournal.com]

My mother absolutely hated being called "Lady" by my father. However, in this instance, I'm pretty sure that it's entirely due to the context. My father wasn't always the friendliest of persons in how he behaved towards my mother. It became an instance of "Don't call me lady..." being proffered as the instance of a challenge, or the stopping of a threat from the other side.

Well, that's likely TMI, but it doesn't show the point that more important than most individual words is any context in which they're used, in each individual case. So....

To be safe, there's no way to be safe. One word that I am greatly offended by would be acceptable to everyone else. To go around and not offend anyone means to live in a very closed place and not converse with people. So, live a life with contact and occasionally offend or sit in a closed room for the rest of your life.

Oh, and please, when referring to buzzing insects, let's check and make sure that when you see an insect with two pairs of membranous wings and an ovipositor specialized for stinging or piercing you might want to consider calling it a hymenoptera rather than the most vulgar expression of 'wasp'.

(see what I mean? ;)