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jmac: After all, there are plenty of contexts where I could legitimately use "boy" in reference to an adult male.
strange interlocutor: Fair enough, but what about that context in the cafe? if you'd been served your coffee by a man, would you have written "the boy who..."? No, you'd have written "the guy who...", and I resist your sexist equivalence of the ambiguous "guy" with the diminutive "girl". Shame shame shame on you.
jmac: [Mumbles, shuffles feet.]
This is an old argument and I back away from having an official opinion on it for today.
