Dear American People

Thank you for being patient with us through the traumatic events of last week. Now let us return to important matters of national interest.

OMG MABEY THE NYSE MIHGT BLOW UP!!1!.

Just sayin'.

xox, the federal government
"Do not run from us. We are your friends."

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Mecha-Lileks responds to this post:

I see that prog has compared the U.S. govt to the aliens from "Mars Attacks". Oh, yes, always such a clever and subtle bon mot, very good.

Again, I have one thing to say: Show me the green lasers. Show me the red lasers.

I hope prog gains a notion of who the real enemy is before the day comes when he is commuting to work and there is a flash of light and why can he see his own ribcage all of a sudden?

Furthermore I was just admiring my collection of "Mars Attacks" trading cards and I can't believe I used to like them. What a foolish youth I was, thinking I was such a rebel. Now if you'll excuse me, it's time for Gnat's daily NBC survival suit training session.